50 things to piss everyone off

I'm sick and tired of hearing about crap that I don't give a shit about.  I'm sick of people trying to make me feel guilty for not giving a shit about stuff the media tells me I'm supposed to care about.  I'm sick of seeing every other post on every other blog about shit I don't give a flying fornication about.

Since everyone pisses me off on a daily basis, I will, in turn, piss every single one of you off...in one fell swoop...

1. There are plenty of charities and organizations I'd rather give my money to.  Katrina is not one of them.
2. Hurricanes are an act of nature.  Only assholes use it for their own religious agendas.
3. Why wasn't anyone harping on the masses to "donate" to rebuild Kauai after hurricane Iniki?
4. Who even knows about Iniki?
5. Would people really give a shit about Katrina if the media didn't cover it non-stop?
6. Quit complaining about Wal-Mart.
7. If you don't want to work at Wal-Mart, find a marketable skill and get a real job.
8. Don't blame Wal-Mart for your own shortcomings.
9. Don't blame the President for your own shortcomings.
10. A friggin' hurricane destroying a city isn't a valid reason to impeach the President.
11. Again, where were you when Iniki hit Hawaii?
12. I was in Hawaii.  Piss off.
13. The lack of enlistment in the US military is not the President's fault.
14. You want to blame someone for our military being undermanned?  Blame yourselves.
15. You bitched about the Draft.  You bitch about lack of military troops.  Without the Draft, enlistment is voluntary.
16. This means you have to get off your fat, lazy asses and enlist...quit whining about working at Wal-Mart.
17. Despite your efforts to delude yourselves, 18-year-old opinions don't count.
18. Especially not here.
19. No one reads your blog because it's BORING.
20. I don't care what you had for lunch today.
21. I don't care if Pete told Stacy that Jen is being a bitch to Carrie because Robert is gay.
22. And unless they're Pete, Stacy, Jen, Carrie or Robert, neither will anyone else.
23. Cindy Sheehan had her chance to talk to the President.  She blew it.  She can go choke on a fat cock and die.
24. Celine Dion is Canadian.  Her opinion doesn't count.
25. Jessica Simpson fans are just as dumb as she is.
26. We shouldn't have stopped Hitler from taking France.
27. Only idiots and assheads compare President Bush to Adolf Hitler.
28. Hitler killed 5 million Jews, 3 million Poles, 200,000 Roma and Sinti, 200,000 disabled people, 10,000 gay men, and 2,000 Jehovah's Witnesses because they were "different".  Where the hell is the connection?  Idiots.
29. Jew is a proper fucking noun.  I'll use the term whenever the hell I want.  Get over yourselves.
30. The Iraqi war death toll is at 1,900.  That's 2 whole years worth.
31. 2,400 died on Omaha Beach alone during WWII.  That's one day!
32. The war in Iraq sucks, but it's not nearly as bad as it could be , or as bad as the media is making it out to be.  Take a fucking history class.
33. Quit blaming your ISP for the spyware on your computer.  Learn how to use it and you won't have that problem.
34. If you don't discipline your kids, don't yell at me when I tell them to "get the fuck out of the way" when they run into me with a shopping cart.
35. Crinkling your nose and waving your hands in front of your face like a retard isn't going to get me to quit smoking in the open outdoors on the off chance that you might walk by me.
36. If you don't like my smoking, don't sit in the smoking section of a god damned bar.
37. You can call me a bitch all you want.  That's not going to keep me from thinking you're an asshat.
38. My comments section has a designated area for your URL.  If people want to click on it, they will.  Adding an extra signature line with your blog url is going to get deleted.  Period.
39. Emailing me to ask why your signature line was deleted is going to get you laughed at.
40. The stuff I provide for download on this site is there for your convenience, not mine.
41. Emailing me to ask stupid questions is inconvenient for me.
42. Don't believe your teachers. There is such a thing as a stupid question.
43. For the millionth time, I will not design porn sites.  Go see her.
44. Yes, a blog template is a site design.  Don't argue with me.  The answer is still NO.
45. I shop at Wal-Mart.  I'm evil.  I'm paying less for my food and supplies than you are.
46. If you're 5' 3" and weigh 200 lbs, you're fat.
47. No one wants to see your fat gut in clothes two sizes too small.
48. No one wants to see your ankles hanging over your shoes.
49. Don't feel insulted when I blow chunks.
50. This is my site.  I pay for it.  I will write whatever the hell I want.  Only my opinion counts.  When I want your opinion, I'll give it to you.